I'm Sorry
by Aichurro
Summary: "I'm sorry." Nitori would tell him. "I'm sorry." He would say when Rin questioned him about the bruises. "I'm sorry." Nitori would say when he refused to let Rin help him.
1. Chapter 1

**_A/N: Because everyone needs sad rintori. WARNING: this fic is triggering, so if any abuse in any form bothers you, please go back!_**

* * *

"I'm fine."

Rin Matsuoka looked down at the shivering boy in front of him. "No you're not. You're lying Nitori." Said boy bowed his head on the park bench. Rin stood in front of Nitori Aiichiro, confronting him. "I know you're not fine. You've been missing practice, acting edgy, and you've been avoiding everyone."

Nitori stood up suddenly, blue eyes locked to the ground. His light grey hair was messy, being blown in the wind. He held his bag tightly to his chest and pushed Rin out of the way. "I'm sorry, I need to go." He mumbled and ran away.

Rin growled, not knowing what was up with Nitori. "Fine! Just run, Nitori! I'm trying to help!" Rin yelled after him. Nitori stopped suddenly and turned to Rin.

"You can't help, senpai. I'm so sorry." He turned and ran again.

The red-head stood there, helpless. He couldn't help his kouhai if he didn't know what was wrong. Maybe he was adjusting back to living with his parents; since they came back to town, Nitori had an option to live with them. It was lonely without the boy at night and the weekends, but Rin figured he was having fun with his parents.

The teen saw Nitori walk away quickly, and Rin did the same. Rin grumbled to himself about Nitori, complaining about how Nitori wasn't telling him anything and how Nitori had better show up to swim practice the next day.

As he started to unlock the door to his dorm, the captain of the Samezuka swim team, Mikoshiba, stopped him. "Did you talk to Nitori?" He asked, wondering about the kid.

Rin sighed and rested his head against the door. "I did. He didn't say what was the matter and he ran away. If he doesn't show up for practice tomorrow, I'll go by his house and see for myself what's wrong with him." He _needed _to know what was wrong.

"Alright. Just don't pressure him too much, okay?" Mikoshiba opened his own door and went inside.

* * *

Rin couldn't stop thinking about his ex-roommate. He couldn't sleep, and the emptiness of the room wasn't helping. He angrily punched the top bunk. "Yo, Nitori." He paused. "That's right." He let his hand fall back to his chest.

Rin was worried, no, terrified of what was going on with Nitori. He was acting weird, secretive, and more emotional than usual. He may have been over reacting, but he couldn't help but worry. Nitori was his best friend- like a brother.

The red head snorted. "Ai, you're a handful." He said to himself. He rolled over and managed to go to sleep.

* * *

The next day, Nitori was late. "Why are you late, Nitori?" The teacher asked. Nitori froze.

"O-oh." Nitori's tensed shoulders fell. "I just tripped when I was walking up the front steps. My books fell and they went everywhere. It took me more than expected to pick them all up." He smiled and went to his seat.

The teacher wrote something in his notebook. "Alright. Don't let it happen again." He left it at that.

Nitori noticed his hand was shaking. _'Matsuoka-senpai isn't in my class. Hah. How can I forget that?' _He thought. He tapped his fingers, looking around the room.

He was still shaking as the third bell rang.

* * *

It was last block, gym. Nitori use to love gym, but now he hated it. People would stare at his pale and skinny figure, trying to figure out why he tried to cover himself up now more than usual. For Nitori, it had a small crack of freedom; he got to talk to Rin and Mikoshiba. It was the only "class" he had with them.

"I hear you were late today, Nitori. You know I don't tolerate that." Nitori wasn't expecting Mikoshiba to scold him on the bleachers.

Nitori turned away, trying to hide his face. "I'm sorry, it won't happen again." He whispered.

Rin sighed and crossed his arms. "Cough up. What happened?"

"N-nothing. I just fell." Nitori bowed his head, leg nervously bouncing. "My books went everywhere, and it took me a while to pick them up."

"Liar." Rin scowled.

The grey-haired first year flinched. "W-what?"

Nitori yelped as Rin took his wrist and held his arm up. Rin quickly pulled the jacket sleeve up to reveal a bruise on his upper arm. "If you fell, explain this." Rin demanded.

"Nitori?" Mikoshiba's golden eyes were wide.

The smaller cowered away. "I hit my side on the stairs. I tried to protect my face, so I turned to the side." He quickly said.

Rin's head dropped. "Okay. I believe you. Next time, just tell me what happened and don't make me worry, okay?" He squeezed Nitori's hand reassuringly.

"Thanks, senpai." Nitori smiled.

As Mikoshiba and Rin walked away, the captain of the swim team leaned closer to the second year. "You don't believe him, do you?"

Rin sighed and shivered. "Not for a second."

* * *

At swim practice, Nitori was even worse. He was trembling the entire time, terrified of what the others would say about his bruises. Luckily, Mikoshiba had lectured the team before Nitori, who was often the last one out of the locker room, came out for them not to ask any questions.

When Nitori got to his platform, he almost fell in he was so off-coordinated. His time got worse, too. Instead of slowing down by half a second, or even a full second, Nitori had slowed down a total of 4 seconds. Normally, Mikoshiba would scold him and make him do extra laps as punishment, or Rin would tease him about it. Instead, the two gave him a sympathetic look.

When it was time to get out of the pool, Nitori couldn't get out. No matter how hard he tried, his shaking arms would give out and he'd fall back in. After the 5th try, he started to cry. Rin helped him out, careful not to pull hard on his bruised arm.

* * *

The walk home was awfully quiet. "Are you truly okay, Nitori?" Rin stopped in the middle of the path.

"Yes, senpai, I am. You're not my mother." Nitori rolled his eyes and smiled, his shaking going down.

"Well you see, Nitori, we're just worried about how your home life is. How is it?" Rin questioned. He needed to know who to beat up; bullies or Nitori's family.

The grey haired boy paused for a second. His blue eyes dulled. "Oh, it's fine. Mom is nice; she feeds me and helps with my homework. Dad works at home, so he doesn't leave often. It is kind of hard, not having any privacy." He giggled.

"Okay. I just wanted to make sure." Rin smiled. He looked up at Nitori's house. It wasn't too big or too small. Nitori took his keys out and unlocked the door. "I would ask to come in, but we have a lot of homework tonight."

"Yeah, mom and dad don't like visitors that much." Nitori smiled and ran a hand through his hair. "Well, see you later, senpai."

Rin waved as he walked down the path to the house. As Nitori shut the door, Rin felt a pang of guilt in him. _'What if he gets hurt? What if they kill him? God, I should have gone in there.' _He stopped as he reached the road. He huffed and turned back around.

When he knocked on the door, there were heavy footsteps, and then the door was swung open. Instead of being greeted by Nitori, an older man was standing there. He had messy grey hair, and he stunk horribly. "Who the hell are you?" The man took a puff of his cigar.

"Oh, I'm Matsuoka Rin. I'm a classmate of Nitori." Rin introduced himself, trying not to gag from the smell.

"Go away, _Rin Matsuoka, _Nitori's busy." Rin struck it odd that Nitori's parents would refer to him by last name.

Rin needed to go check on Nitori, to make sure he was fine. "H-He needed some help in math, and since I'm an upperclassman and his ex-roommate, I thought I could help him." He hoped his story was convincing.

The man yelled up the stairs near the door. "Oy, Nitori! Get your ass down here!" He yelled. The sudden loud voice startled Rin.

Nitori came down the stairs quickly. His eyes looked wild and afraid. "Yes, sir?"

"Who is this?" A cigar was pointed at Rin.

Nitori bit his lip. "My friend and ex-roommate, Matsuoka Rin." He said quickly.

"And why is he here?"

"T-to…" He didn't know why. Nitori looked down.

Rin butted in. "You needed some help in math, didn't you Nitori?" He quickly answered.

"I-I do. I'm sorry." Nitori apologized.

Nitori glanced up at his father. He snarled. "Nobody can help my stupid son!" With that, the door was slammed in Rin's face.

His heart dropped. He just screwed Nitori over. He couldn't do anything about it, but he desperately wanted to help him.

Rin had to walk away from the house hearing screaming and yelling.

"I swear I will help you, Ai." Rin whispered under his breath. The pathetic 'I'm sorry' rung in his ears. _'Ai, don't be sorry.' _

* * *

**_A/N: This is a multi-chapter fic, so stick around peeps!_**


	2. Chapter 2

**_Again: A bunch of trigger warnings. You have been warned!_**

* * *

"What the _hell _do you mean I can't help him?" Rin slammed his fist down on the desk. He wasn't just mad, no, he was furious.

Mikoshiba sat behind the desk, arms crossed. "Now Matsuoka, I know you're worried. I am too, but there's just not enough evidence that he's being abused. If he shows up to practice, we'll ask him." The captain sighed and leaned back in the chair.

Rin clenched his fists. "Captain you just don't get it! I saw how his parents treated him last night! Nitori looked like he was about to cry, and we have to help him!" His breathing was erratic, near hyperventilating. "He didn't show up all day, so what makes you think he's going to show up now?" He hissed.

"Matsuoka, I'm sure he'll come in. He never misses practice. If he doesn't, we'll go to his house and talk to him there." Mikoshiba looked out the office window to see the team practicing. He would occasionally glance at the pool entrance to see if Nitori would enter.

The second year rubbed his neck. The anxiety was getting to him; he felt like he was going to be sick he was so worried. "What if they won't let us in? What if Nitori's dead?" Rin assumed the worse.

"He's not dead. If they won't let us in, we'll just ask for them to get Nitori to call us. Worse comes to worse, we break our way in." The captain stood now, walking to the office door. "If you're up to it, we have to get back to practice."

Rin nodded and got his stuff. He was a little dizzy, but he wasn't going to let it stop him. When he got to his platform, he glanced over at the door. Nitori was still not there.

His head was spinning with awful thoughts. The sight of seeing Nitori covered in bruises and cuts clouded his mind, making him wobble on his platform. His grip on the edge tightened, making the teammates stare at him. He tried not to fall over, but when he fell into the water it brought him back to reality.

The others started to laugh at Rin for falling in, but Mikoshiba rushed to the teen and pulled him out. Rin's eyes were wide and frantic. He looked terrified. "Matsuoka, go sit down." Mikoshiba ordered. He looked at the others. "10 extra laps! Now!" He yelled.

Rin sat on the bench and grabbed his phone from his bag. He went to his contacts and called Nitori. It rung several times, but there was no connection. He tried multiple times, but to no avail. "He's not answering." His head was killing him.

"I'm sure he's fine." Mikoshiba sat next to him. His breathing was heavy.

A few minutes later, Rin had gotten a text on his phone from Nitori.

'What is it?' It said.

Rin almost jumped when the text came; it gave him the reassuring fact that Nitori was alive. 'Can you come to practice?' Rin replied.

It took a few moments before he got a reply, but Rin sighed in relief when he got a 'Yes' from his first-year.

Rin looked over to the captain, who was helping others with their swimming strokes. "He's coming."

Mikoshiba grinned. "Good. Just sit there until he gets here. When he does, take him to my office." He said.

* * *

When Nitori arrived, he limped a bit. His jacket was zipped all the way up and he still wore his sweat pants. There was a slight dullness to his eyes which startled Rin. The older male walked up to Nitori and took his bag. "Hey, Nitori. Captain wants me to take you to his office so we can talk." He said, gently grabbing Nitori's arm, making him wince. "Sorry."

Nitori smiled. "Why do we need to talk? I'm fine, I told you. I just fell." He started to defend himself as Rin led him to the room.

After entering the room, Rin made Nitori sit down on a chair. "Stay." He said. Nitori looked up at him, puzzled. "Knowing you, you'd probably just run off like usual."

Nitori pouted, "No I won't! My knee is hurting me, so I can't run!" He explained.

"Just shut up and stay there, Ai." Rin pressed down on Nitori's head, something he often does.

Nitori closed his eyes. "Please don't do that." He whined. Rin took his hand off and Nitori rubbed his head. "My head's really tender."

"It's never hurt you before."

"Well…"

Mikoshiba entered the room when Nitori tried to explain the situation. "Nitori, we need to talk." He sat down at the desk. "It's about your family."

Rin saw Nitori visibly tense up. "W-what about them?"

"Do you all get along?" Mikoshiba asked. Nitori nodded after hesitating. "Rin told me about what happened last night. Why did your father yell at you?"

Nitori fidgeted in his seat. "He was angry from earlier. He had drank a little too much, but he's not like that all the time I swear!" He defended.

Rin sighed. "Why didn't your mother interfere?" He spoke for Mikoshiba.

"She was out."

"So she left you with your drunken father?" Mikoshiba stared at Nitori, making him squirm.

Nitori's eyes darted to the ground. "Well, she was there, but not _there_, if you know what I mean. She got mad too that Rin had to come to the house."

Mikoshiba leaned back against his char. "Take your jacket off." He ordered.

The first year hesitated but stood up. His hands were shaking as his fingers wrapped around the zipper and pulled it down. He was trembling after taking it off, standing there with only a T-shirt on. "Now take your shirt off."

Nitori had tears in his eyes. He looked over at Rin. "Please, I don't want to."

Rin felt so bad seeing his friend like this. It was cruel of the captain to do this, but Rin noticed Mikoshiba looked nervous too. Rin felt like he was going to faint. "Nitori, I know you don't want to. But it's for your safety. Please just take your shirt off."

Nitori was trembling so hard Rin thought he might collapse. Nitori was breathing heavily as he lifted the shirt up. His arms fell back down. "I-I can't. I'm sorry." He apologized. He was on the edge of crying, and both of the older boys knew that if he started to cry, they would both cry also.

Mikoshiba closed his eyes in frustration. "Rin." Rin looked up, not use to Mikoshiba calling him by his birth name. "Help him."

Nitori shivered as Rin grabbed the hem of the shirt and gently took it off. Mikoshiba sighed when he saw Nitori's chest. Rin was furious. "Nitori…" Rin had to restrain himself from fainting.

On Nitori's chest there were several deep red burns in the shape of a circle, his sides were bruised, and his arms had hand-shaped bruises on them. "I-I'm sorry." Nitori tried to cover his chest up. "I just fell, and I got hurt and I just wanted to cover them up." He stuttered.

Rin just wanted to hug the kid. "Ai…did your dad burn you with his cigar?"

Nitori went quiet.

"Did he hit you?"

Silence.

"I'm so sorry for not telling you." Nitori finally whispered. It was choked out, barely audible.

Rin touched Nitori's shoulder, just ever so gently, and reassured him. "Don't be sorry, Ai."

The boy had enough. He turned around to Rin and tackled him. He sobbed into Rin's chest hard. "I'm so sorry!" He cried. The grip he had on Rin was tight, but Rin wouldn't let him loosen up.

"It's okay, Ai. We're going to help you." Rin hugged him back tightly. His voice quivered. Before he knew it, he had also started to cry. "I'm sorry for not knowing what was going on Ai."

Nitori just kept sobbing, not caring how much it hurt his chest to hug Rin. "I'm so sorry for not telling you!" He repeated.

Mikoshiba smiled. "Aiichiro, don't be sorry. It's not your fault. It will never be your fault. We _are _going to help you." He got out of his chair and hugged Nitori.

Nitori tried to smile through his tears. "T-thank you so much!" He choked out.

* * *

**_A/N: What a lot of people don't seem to understand about child abuse is that the victim isn't the only one affected, the friends of the victim can also be affected. Ahh I just hate portraying Nitori as being weak/dependent, because he's anything but. (I mean he puts up with Rin) But trust me, he'll get a shining moment!_**


	3. Chapter 3

It took almost an hour to calm Nitori down. With his constant cries of apologizes for not telling them the news, or Rin and Mikoshiba's assurance everything will be okay, it took a while. Rin had managed to get Nitori seated and calm, while Mikoshiba talked on the phone with the police.

Rin held Nitori's hand, rubbing the soft skin with his thumb, whispering reassurances. "It'll be okay, Ai. We're going to get you to safety, okay?" He would repeat while Nitori would nod his head.

Mikoshiba sighed in frustration. "So when will you be able to remove him?" A pause. "Miss you don't understand, he is covered in bruises, he _needs _help now. Just don't evaluate the situation, please just hurry!" He voice rose.

Nitori sniffed. "Are my parents going to be arrested?" He managed to say after a few minutes of silence.

"Yes. As soon as the police can come, heavens know when, you'll be safe." Mikoshiba told him after he hung up. "The police will come by tomorrow, so please just hang on until then."

Rin stood up, shocked. "So you're just gonna send him home?" His eyes were wide. The loudness of his voice made Nitori flinch.

"Yes. We have no choice. If he comes back to our dorms after visitation hours, he'll be considered trespassing. He'll be arrested, Rin." Mikoshiba explained in a calm voice.

The red head opened his mouth to speak in objection, but the stern glare from the captain made him reconsider. "Can we at least walk him home, together? I just want to make sure he'll be okay." He suggested.

Mikoshiba looked down at Nitori. "Is it okay if we do that, Nitori?"

Nitori nodded and spoke. "I don't need you to, but thanks." He stood up and put his shirt back on. He grabbed his bag and nearly lost his balance. Rin shot his arm out to help him, but Nitori knocked his arm away. "I'm fine."

Rin looked at him, stunned. "O-okay."

Mikoshiba opened the door, watching Nitori struggle with the heavy bag on his sore shoulder. He watched Rin fume and worry silently. "It's going to be okay." He mumbled to Rin on his way out.

* * *

The walk was filled with a high amount of tension. Mikoshiba was worried that Rin may snap at any minute, Rin was worried about Nitori's safety or he was going to attack his parents, and Nitori was worried that his upperclassmen might fight his parents. Not that Nitori was going to complain if they did that.

"Are you sure you're fine, Ai?" Rin asked for what seemed the hundredth time.

Nitori had soon become slightly irritated with the older teen, constantly telling him he was fine and that he didn't need any help. "You're my kouhai, Ai. I'm supposed to look out for you." Rin would tell him.

"I'm just saying that I don't need a lot of help."

"Well we are going to help you." Rin smiled and grabbed Nitori's bag. "Here. I'll carry it since you're in no shape to carry this." Nitori tried to protest, but deciding not to was his smartest move.

Nitori crossed his sore arms, continuing to walk. He didn't want to go back home, but he didn't want his friends to be involved with his problems. "You don't have to do this, you guys. It's my fault." He felt a pang of guilt.

Mikoshiba scoffed and rolled his eyes. "It's not your fault they're treating you like this Nitori! We need to do this; an upperclassman is supposed to look after their underclassman!" He stated, stubbornly trying to convince Nitori that they would help him.

Nitori walked ahead of them, trying to fight back the hot tears that were welling up in his blue eyes.

* * *

At Nitori's house, the trio felt the tension rise to its peak. Rin noticed Nitori was shaking as he pulled his keys out of his pockets and fidgeted with the keys to get them into the lock.

But when the door swung open Nitori yelped and dropped the metal keys.

"Aiichirou! Why were you out so late?" A woman stood in the door way. She smelt heavily of alcohol and cigarettes. "Who are these brats?" A long and bony finger pointed at the upperclassmen.

Nitori shifted his weight and looked down. "I had swim practice, remember?"

"You're on the swim team?"

Mikoshiba cocked his head, remembering Nitori's mother signing the permission forms. Nitori smiled and tried to explain. "Mom, you're drunk. You don't remember. Anyway, this is Seijuurou Mikoshiba, the captain. This is Matsuoka Rin, my ex-roommate." He gestured to the teens.

Nitori's mother sneered and glared at Rin. "So you're the kid he won't shut up about? Huh. Expected you to be cuter." She slurred. "I wonder when he's going to suck you off."

Nitori's face turned red as his head bowed further down. "Mom…"

"So Aiichirou, why aren't you making dinner?" The mom snapped suddenly.

Rin and Mikoshiba felt bad for having to stand there and listen to it, but there wasn't much they could do. "Y-you stopped me." Nitori stammered.

The woman, who had angry blue eyes, which contrasted to Nitori's gentle blue, pointed inside the house. "Get your ass in here." She growled. "I suggest you make something good, because it was a shitty day for me and your father. And I got a phone call from someone earlier today, so you better explain it to me." Everyone's heart sank. Mikoshiba had told the worker not to call the house, that it could put him in even more danger.

Nitori looked back at his teammates, horrified. "I'm sorry. Good bye." He turned back to his mother and walked back inside with her, slowly shrinking inwards, trying to avoid his mother.

The woman looked back at them and hissed, "Now get off my property."

The door was slammed in their face.

* * *

Back at the dorms, Rin had decided to spend the night in Mikoshiba's dorm. "She's awful." Rin said after a few moments of silence.

Mikoshiba was leaning against the wall, looking out of the window. "I'm surprised I didn't kill her." His leg was bouncing, and Rin knew that was a sign not to piss him off.

"Me too, but I'll call Nitori later and ask him if he's going to come to school tomorrow." Rin mumbled, clutching a pillow.

The captain punched the wall, furious. "I told them not to call, not to say anything. It's my entire fault if Nitori's hurt." Mikoshiba fell back into his desk chair, head in hands. His voice was shaking in fear and anger. "What if they kill him, Rin?" His first name again. Rin knew Mikoshiba was terrified.

"They're not going to. If anything, they're going to try and cover it before the worker comes." Rin said. "Wait. You said the worker was a woman, didn't you?"

"Yes, why?"

Rin swore loudly. "Nitori's not of age yet. The worker's a woman. In order for someone to inspect an underage kid, the parent has to show consent. There's no way those fat and lazy bastards are going to let her search him. They're never going to know if Nitori is injured unless they see his bruises." His breath was shaky.

He grabbed his cellphone off the desk and dialed Nitori's number. It picked up after a long time. "Ai!"

"Y-yes?" Nitori's voice was quiet and calm.

Rin didn't know what to say; he wasn't expecting Nitori to answer. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. My mom just wanted to talk to me about something. I didn't do well on a test, so she got my dad to belt me." A slight chuckle. "It still hurts."

When Rin put it on speaker, the two knew Nitori was lying. "Are you coming to school?"

After a moment of silence, Nitori whispered, "Maybe. I don't know. My leg got hurt a little, so I'm not sure. And then there's my bottom, so I can't sit real well." He groaned.

"What happened with your leg?" Nitori still thought he was talking to only Rin, so Mikoshiba wrote down what to ask while he took notes.

Nitori sighed. "I accidently spilt some hot water on it. It hurts to walk a bit." He explained, voice quivering. "Oh? I have to go now."

Rin jumped. "Wait, Ai!" His voice went high and loud.

"Yes?"

Rin laughed lightly. "You'll be okay."

The phone went quite, but a small choking sound was heard on Rin's side. It turned into a moan, and later turned into sniffs. He had made Nitori cry. "T-thank you." Nitori said so quietly it was barely audible.

Rin turned speaker off, not wanting Mikoshiba to hear the rest. "I know you like me." He said, not meaning to blurt it out.

"You do?" Nitori squeaked out.

"Yes. I just wanted to tell you I love you, and that you'll get through this." Rin smiled, looking down at his tapping fingers. "No matter what, you'll be okay."

Nitori sniffed. "Thank you so much. I lov-" Nitori was cut off by a loud yell.

"Aiichirou! Get your ass down here! I called you before!" A shriek was heard.

Nitori laughed, wiping a tear away from his bruised cheek. "Thank you and the captain so much. I love you so much…Rin." Nitori choked back another sob and hung up. His entire body ached, from head to toe. He had been crying so much his head was killing him, and his waist was so bruised and it hurt so much that most of his clothes hurt to wear.

"What happened?" Mikoshiba asked, wondering what happened after he had been cut off.

Rin smiled and set the phone down. "Hope. Friendship. Love." He said, trying to fight back tears of his own.

"Oh no, don't be going soft on me." Mikoshiba teased.

Rin rolled his eyes. "I think I already have gone soft. For Nitori Aiichirou."

* * *

**_A/N: I don't really have much to say this chapter, so I hope you guys enjoyed (?) this chapter. There are 2 or 3 chapters left, and then that's the end! ouo_**


	4. Chapter 4

**_This chapter is very triggering, so continue with caution!_**

* * *

Nitori's breath escaped him as his back hit the hard wall. As he slid down the plastered white wall, Nitori rubbed his sore head; sore from his mother pulling his hair. "How could you betray us?!" A shrill shriek was heard. Nitori wasn't paying attention; he was only focused on how much pain he was in. "Listen to me you little brat!" His leg was kicked hard.

The scream was loud and pain-filled, his pale and small hands grasping his shin. "Please don't! I'm sorry!" Nitori cried out, trying to cover himself. He didn't want to be hit, to be yelled at, to be hated. "I'm sorry!"

His mother grabbed his hair and yanked him to his feet. She was smaller than him, but he slouched and let her pull him. "How could you call them? You're just going to leave us here? All alone, no son to take care of…" His mother grabbed his hand, rubbing the soft skin. "Do you hate us?"

Nitori shook his head frantically. His father stood to her side, ready to jump in if needed. He didn't want to say the wrong thing; it would get him beaten even worse. "Why? Do you want to leave us?" His mother cooed, stroking Nitori's pale skin.

"N-no. I didn't call anyone. My friends thought I was hurt, so they called the police." Nitori said, afraid. Despite his nice words, he knew he would be beaten before the night was over. "I'm sorry."

His mother laughed and slapped him hard. Her hand stung, and a bright red mark appeared on the boy's face. "You're filthy." She scowled. "You're disgusting." She spat on him.

His father stepped near them and laughed when Nitori started to cry. Nitori's knees went weak, holding onto the wall to prevent himself from collapsing. He was humiliated and in pain, unable to stand up for himself. While his parents often told him how much of a disappointment he is, he would tell himself the same. "Stop, please." Nitori mumbled, scared.

The father grabbed Nitori's arm hard, cutting the blood flow off. "What was that?" He growled.

"N-nothing." Nitori looked down. His father grabbed his hair and pulled him to his height.

"You better hope you didn't say anything. You're a failure in life." He sneered, wiping a tear away from Nitori's eyes.

Nitori grabbed the large hand and tried to pry it off. "No I'm not, you pigs." He hissed back, trying to defend himself. It may get him a worse punishment, but his parents would know that he could stand his ground.

His father's eye twitched and brought his free hand back into a fist. When he punched Nitori, the impact was loud, and the punch would probably leave a mark that would last a few weeks. "Ngh…" Nitori moaned in the ground as his father dropped him.

"You're coming with me." His father picked Nitori up, despite his pleas. "You're going to stay here." He told his wife. "We're going to have a talk."

Whenever Nitori and his father would have a 'talk', there were very little words involved.

"N-No! Please I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Nitori cried hysterically as he was led up the steps. "Stop it!" He whined when he was tossed into his parents' room.

His father glared at him. "This talk is going to be longer than the others." Nitori's heart dropped. "You need to learn some respect. Bow." He ordered.

Nitori hesitated, but did as told. The bow had a slight angle; Nitori still defying his father. His father took a hand full of grey hair and made him bow further. "Good boy." His father pet his head, making Nitori flinch from the gentle touch. Whenever his father was gentle, it meant worse was to come.

His head was hurting from the deep bow, but he couldn't say anything. He just had to accept the humiliation. "On your hands and knees." His father yelled.

Nitori yelped from the loud voice, but obeyed. He got on the dirty floor and bowed his head. "Now what do you say?" His father dug into Nitori's hand with the heel of his boot.

"I-I'm sorry…ngh….forgive me." Nitori winced when the boot stomped on his hand harder.

His father walked over to the bed and took his belt off. "You know what to do." Nitori whined, turning pale. He walked over to the wall next to the bed and took his shirt off.

"Ahh…so beautiful." His father touched the burn marks and bruises on his son's chest. "Turn around."

Nitori turned and put his hands on the wall. He dreaded the punishment of yelling out, but he also dreaded what would happen if he was quiet. His father doubled the belt up and grinned. "20."

The belt was raised and came down just as fast. The sound of leather striking Nitori's back echoed throughout the room. Nitori inhaled sharply and flinched. "O-one." He said sternly. His father was hitting harder than usual; there was no way he could remain quiet for long.

Nitori stayed quiet and calm until the 10th stroke. He broke and yelled when the leather hit a sore spot. Tears were streaming down his face as he tried to remain calm, but couldn't. "Oh? You're a wimp." His father spat.

His father grabbed his son's arm and guided him to the bed, unable to do so by himself because he was sobbing so hard. He was bent over the bed and had his pants removed. "No…" Nitori moaned into the bed and grabbed the sheets. "Please don't."

His father raised the belt again and struck him again on the lower back, moving to his lower thighs. By time the final ten were dealt, Nitori had to prevent himself from fainting from the pain. He was breathing heavy into the bed until his father's fingers pulled his underwear down. "H-huh?" Nitori was in too much pain to know what was going to happen next.

But when his father started to take his own clothes off, it finally struck Nitori what was going to happen to him.

* * *

Rin sat in class, leg shaking in anticipation. He needed to know if Nitori was in school or not today, but he wouldn't know until last block. The possibility of him going to swim practice was low, so Rin didn't consider seeing him there. He tried to talk to the captain; to see if he had talked to Nitori.

When it came to last block, Rin was furious at not seeing his friend. He refused to participate, despite Mikoshiba's pressuring. Rin sat on the bleachers, with Mikoshiba talking to him. "He's fine, Matsuoka!" He said, voice filled with false assurance.

"He's not at school captain; you saw how his mother treated him. He's probably being beaten right this minute!" Rin stood up suddenly, grabbing his bag. "There's only 20 minutes left of class, so I'm going."

"Matsuoka!" Mikoshiba grabbed his arm. "Don't do anything you'll regret."

"My only regrets will be caused by Nitori being hurt. I'm not going to regret beating his parents like they do him." Rin hissed and pulled his arm away. "And I'm not going to practice. I'll be in my dorm, figuring out a way to help Ai, because God knows nobody else is." He stormed out, pushing the door open and slamming it behind him.

Mikoshiba watched him walk away, unable to say anything. Mikoshiba talked to the coach and went to the office, announcing there was no practice. He was going to help him, despite Rin's anger.

* * *

Rin called Nitori's cell several times, not getting an answer. After the 10th call, he gave up. Every time there was a longer pause than usual, he would perk up, only to be disappointed when it went to his voice mail. "Ai…" Rin mumbled, glancing at Nitori's bunk.

Rin sighed heavily when he heard the loud knocking on his door. Mikoshiba greeted him with a grin. "Good news, Matsuoka!" He walked in and sat on Rin's bed, much to his annoyance.

"Nitori's parents are dead?"

Mikoshiba held a piece of paper out. "I talked to social services and police." He grinned. Rin snatched the paper and started to read it. The captain scribbled it so fast Rin had trouble reading the messy characters. "They said that as soon as Nitori confirms that he's being abused, they'll come in within an hour, or in a few seconds if they're there, and take him away!"

Rin's eyes widened. "So…all we have to do is call Ai, ask him if his parents are abusing him, the police come, his parents are arrested, and Ai comes back here with us?"

"Yup!" Mikoshiba pulled his phone out. "_And_! I managed to talk to one of the office workers at school to give me Nitori's household info. Do you know how hard it was to get it? Very! Anyway, I have his parents' numbers and his house phone's number. So we're bound to get an answer from _someone._" He explained.

Rin sighed in relief. "So he might be able to leave tonight?"

"It depends on if he answers or not. If he doesn't, he won't go. If he does, he'll be back here." Mikoshiba dialed Nitori's number. "I'll take Nitori and his dad's phone. You take his mom and his house phone."

Rin nodded and took the numbers and called. When he called the mother's number, he got no answer. They called the house phone also to get no answer.

"They're probably getting annoyed by how many times we're calling. They're bound to answer sooner or later. Just keep calling." Mikoshiba grinned.

Rin hesitated. "Can I call his number instead of his mom's?" Mikoshiba let him do so, but he still go no answer.

* * *

A man's grunt echoed in the room, bouncing off the walls and slapping Nitori in the face.

"Ahh!" Nitori cried.

Another grunt.

"Ahhh! Stop, please!" Nitori cried, clutching the bed sheets.

His father breathed heavily on his neck. "Ahhh, you want me to stop. No. If you like that brat, you'll have to get use to this." He grunted again and thrusted himself in.

Nitori was sobbing. "P-please, stop."

There was a knocking at the door, and his father let his mother enter. "Oh my." His mother seemed shocked at the sight, but giggled. "I bet Aiichiro likes that." She pulled her phone out and started to take pictures and videos.

Nitori buried his face in the bed sheet, trying to hide his naked and ashamed body. "Honey, I need him to come with me." His mother said after a few more minutes.

His father pulled out and hit Nitori's lower back, making him collapse onto the bed. "Fine. I think he got the message tonight."

Nitori looked at the wall, eyes blank. His body ached, still not used to his father's talks. It hurt more that he expected it too; he must have gotten weak to the aching pain. His father grabbed his hair and pulled him up, nearly going limp. "Get dressed." He ordered.

His movements were like a machine, flowing smoothly and automatic. He was use to their commands and demands. He looked at his mother blankly. "What do you need me to do?" Nitori asked, voice hoarse from crying so loudly.

"I have to ask you something." She motioned her now dressed husband and child down the stairs.

"Come on." His father grabbed his sore arms and pushed him down the wooden stairs. To Nitori, it felt like a demon was dragging him down to hell, knowing he'll never be able to go back to heaven.

As they entered the kitchen, the house phone rang. "Good God! Who's been calling us?" His mother shrieked. "Aiichiro, did you have something to do with this?" She asked.

Nitori stared at her, eyes void of emotion. "I don't know. I don't remember." He said, voice quivering.

His mother sneered and walked around the counter. "I know there's something that will make you remember." Nitori almost fainted when she pulled the shiny knife out of the holder. "Bring him here."

His father pushed him forward, holding Nitori up. He was crying hysterically, only having been punished like this only once before. His mother had taken his hand and cut him in both of his palms, leaving him unable to write or swim for weeks. "No, please!" Nitori pleaded, his mother grabbing his bruised wrist.

"It's okay; it'll help you remember!" She took the knife and placed it at the skin between his thumb and pointer finger. The cut was quick but pained filled. Nitori cried out loudly and tried to grab his hand, but his father held his uninjured hand back. His mother still gripped it tightly, pushing her thumb into the bloody crevice. "So do you know who's calling and why? We're not answering until you tell us."

Nitori shook his head, trembling violently. The pain was even worse than before; unable to feel the previous pain. "I don't know." He managed to say.

His father laughed. "I hear salt helps restore _memory_." He tightened his grip. Nitori was now begging not to be hurt even more.

"St-stop!" He begged, watching his mother retrieve salt from a cabinet. When it was first poured on, the blood turned the substance white. It didn't hurt until his mother rubbed it in. "Aaah! Stop please!" Nitori's body went limp, only being supported by his father. He let him go, letting him collapse to the floor.

Nitori clutched his hand in severe pain. This had never happened before; so Nitori didn't know how long it would take for the injury to heal. The phone rang again, and his parents picked him up. "You're going to answer it." His father pushed him into the table supporting the phone.

His right hand was shaky as he picked it up. "H-hello?"

"Nitori!" Rin was loud on the other end. "Why weren't you answering?"

His parents, able to hear the conversation, told him what to say. "Tell him we were having a talk."

Nitori inhaled, trying to contain himself from crying again. He was clutching his shirt with his bloody hand, soaking the white shirt. "We were having a talk. Why are you calling?"

Rin noticed he seemed too dodgy on the phone. "We have news. Captain talked to the services and police, so if you say that they're abusing you, you'll be removed from the house today!" Rin whispered the next part. "And there's police there already, so you'll be okay, if they move in in time."

Nitori squirmed when his mother's hand gripped his shoulder. "You're not leaving us." She whispered in his ear. "You're not going to leave you poor parents, are you?" She giggled, wrapping her arms around Nitori.

"So, are you being abused? Mikoshiba's talking to the police now, so we'll be able to tell them immediately." Rin was hopeful that Nitori would be honest.

Nitori glanced down at his bloody hand and back at his parents. He went quiet and whispered something into the phone.

"No."

Rin's heart dropped, nearly dropping the phone. "N-nitori. Are you sure?"

"I am. I'm not being hurt." Nitori said quickly, his parents slapping his back.

Rin laughed quietly, only saying one thing. "Nitori. If they're pressuring you to say that, you won't be helped. So I'll ask again. Ai. Are you being hurt? If you are, you'll be able to come and live at Samezuka again." He asked.

Nitori wiped a tear away. "Rin…." Rin perked up, not hearing Nitori say his first name without 'senpai' on the end.

"I'm sorry." Nitori dropped the phone and turned around to his parents.

"Nitori! Nitori! Can you hear me?" Rin was screaming into the phone, hearing Nitori's parents.

His mother sighed and his father laughed. His mother approached him, stroking his tear-stained face. "You're such a good boy….Ai."

Nitori didn't know what happened next, other than he slapped his mother. He remembered that he pushed her after slapping her away. It was like something snapped inside of him, making him do weird stuff. "Don't call me Ai! Only Rin-senpai is allowed to call me that!"

Rin leaned in, able to hear Nitori's shrieks. "A-ai?"

"I'm sick of both of you manipulating me! I'm not your slave! I'm your _child._ You're supposed to protect me, to encourage me….to love me. You've done none of that!" Nitori screamed, pushing his father away when he tried to grab him. "Don't you try and tell me that you love me and I'll miss you! I want both of you to die!" He grabbed his hair with both hands, bloodying his hair. "I'm tired of having to hide myself and my bruises! I'm sick of you two doing whatever you please with me! I'm not your doll anymore!" Nitori clenched his fists.

"I hate you!"

His father's punch was quick and painful, sending him into the wall. His head hit the wall, moaning in pain as he slid down. Nitori glared up at his furious parents, eyes equally furious. "I hate both of you! I want you both to die!" He grabbed the phone quickly. "Yes Rin! Yes!" He shrieked, his parents snatching the phone away.

"You! Little! Brat!" His father screamed, kicking him down. His mother kicked his back as his father kicked his front.

"How could you betray us?" His mother cried out, kicking his head.

Nitori grabbed his head, protecting himself. "I…hate…you…" He gritted out between each kick.

Rin's eyes were wide with horror, motioning Mikoshiba to give the order. "Ai! Ai!" He screamed louder.

Nitori, despite the loud surrounding, was able to hear Rin. "I'm sorry, Rin senpai…" He smiled, blood streaking his face after his father broke skin. He couldn't feel the pain anymore, only focused on his thoughts. _'They're coming in. Soon. I don't know when exactly, but soon. I'll be able to leave this place. I won't miss it. Mom and Dad are yelling something. I don't know what. What's Rin senpai saying?' _Nitori smiled at the phone. "Senpai…" He whispered as his father kicked his chest.

When the police managed to get in, they were too late.


	5. Chapter 5

The funeral was deathly quiet; the smell of flowers tainted the air. There were sobs, but Rin Matsuoka stood in front of the casket silently. It was open for the last time, and Rin knew it would be the last time he would ever see his best friend again. He looked so peaceful, like he was sleeping. The funeral director had applied makeup to conceal Nitori's bruised face and swollen neck. After Rin had begged the police and paramedics after they came in not to hang up the phone, they had went against Rin's desperate cries. It wasn't until the next day that Rin had found out that Nitori had lived until they got to the hospital, eventually passing because of internal bleeding and brain damage. They had told Rin and Mikoshiba that even if he had managed to live, that he would be in a state of comatose for the rest of his life.

Rin stroked Nitori's face, noticing it was stiff from rigor mortis. Nitori was wearing his school uniform, with his swim jacket folded in his arms. For some reason, he couldn't cry. Everyone was crying like a lost child, but Rin stood there silently, accepting the fact that Nitori was dead. "Hey, Ai." Rin smiled and clutched his hand. "Be good up in heaven. Maybe you can swim up there, in the clouds." He chuckled and sniffed. Tears were forming, but refused to cry. Rin knew Ai wouldn't want him to cry.

'_Senpai must be strong! Don't cry, it makes me sad when people cry.'_

Rin could hear his voice in his head. Rin, despite the gloomy mood, laughed loudly. Gou, who didn't know about the situation until the following week after his death, cried into the captain's shoulder. The captain held her tightly, both sobbing loudly.

Rin looked back at them and smiled. "Why are you crying?" He asked both of them, petting Gou's hair.

They both looked up at him, eyes red. "N-ni…Aiichiro." Mikoshiba's voice was hoarse and quiet, and Gou's was similar.

"You should be happy." Rin said, gripping his jacket. "He's in a place where he doesn't have to be sorry. He's in a place where he'll never be hurt again. And I know he's watching us; not wanting us to cry. He never did like seeing people crying." Rin reassured them, imagining Nitori's smiling face. "His parents faced justice and now he's at peace. He's even got a big place to be buried in!" He gestured around the graveyard, the graves several feet apart.

Mikoshiba helped Gou sit up and wrapped his arm around her. "Yeah…you're right." He said, voice still quiet.

"We just have to remember him! He's still our kouhai, and he always will!" Rin grinned, shark teeth gleaming.

Gou looked up at her brother. "Rin…how can you be so positive right now?" She said, wiping her eyes.

Rin smiled and looked back at the coffin, now closed. "If Ai could be positive going through that, so can I."

The three watched the casket lower into the ground, and the trio threw their flowers into the hole before it was closed up.

* * *

"Hm? What are you doing here so early, Matsuoka?" Mikoshiba looked down at the red head.

Rin looked at the flowers in his hand. "I could say the same to you." He said, gesturing to the patch of grass next to the headstone to sit. "I just wanted to visit Ai."

"You look like a mess." Mikoshiba sat and placed the flowers on. "What happened?"

The red head sighed and brushed the grass off his hair. "I visited last night. I must have fallen asleep." He smiled slightly.

The duo sat quietly for a few minutes, listening to the birds chirp. Mikoshiba looked over at the childrens' graveyard and sighed. The vases were smashed, the headstones vandalized, and small statues pushed over. "How could someone disrespect a dead child so much?" His eyes were sad.

"How could anyone hurt a living child so much?" Rin said, slightly angry from the sight. Mikoshiba dropped the conversation.

After a few more minutes of silence, Rin spoke up. "It seems like forever since we've all sat together like this peacefully." He grinned, voice quivering.

"Yeah." Mikoshiba nodded. "I wonder what Aiichiro's dreaming about." He went silent. "Hey, Matsuoka."

"Yes?"

"Is it true…that you liked Aiichiro?" The birds stopped chirping, only to fly away from the trees after Rin laughed loudly.

He fell back on the grass and laughed harder. "That's like saying is the sky blue! I did. I just didn't like him. He was my best friend, my support, and my love. I loved him more than anyone I've ever met. But now…it's like part of my world is gone. But I know we'll be re-united one day. I'll be able to see him without harm, without bruises, without tears! I'll be able to hold him and tell him it's okay, that he's safe now, nothing can hurt him. And-" he went quiet before shaking his head, wiping tears away.

Mikoshiba smiled. "It's okay. Say, what were his parents charged with?" He knew, but he wanted to hear again, making sure that they would be in hell in prison and in death.

"Child abuse, battery, neglect, manslaughter, rape, statutory rape, child pornography, and assaulting an officer because they hit one of the police officers and tried to attack Ai on the gurney."

"So he was still alive?" Mikoshiba was shocked; he thought he was dead when they arrived.

Rin nodded and explained, "He was unconscious, but when they got to the hospital he had passed from internal bleeding and brain damage. If he had lived, Sei…there's no telling how long it would take him to recover, _if _he could recover."

Mikoshiba laughed. "But now he's an angel. I remember he once told me that he had to play an angel in a school play in elementary school. Ironic, right? A kid who played an angel would eventually be one."

Rin looked at the grave and its inscription. "Nitori Aiichiro, an angel who returned home." He read aloud. "When I was talking earlier and I was telling you about what I'd do when I see him again…there's one more thing."

Mikoshiba looked over at him, and grinned. "Your secret's safe with me."

"Since I never got the chance…"

"Yes?"

Rin looked up at the sky and smiled, tears finally being released after weeks of holding them in. "I'd tell him I love him."

* * *

_**Epilogue**_

Mikoshiba stood up after the sun had set. He and Rin had sat at the grave, talking about Nitori and laughed about the silly stories about him. Rin had told him that Nitori once got nightmares and wanted to sleep with him, he had walked into the wrong class, he once wore a dress after losing a bet, and how he was the most popular maid at their traditional café. Mikoshiba had told Rin about how Nitori would ask him for prank ideas (Rin finally figured out who had put dye in his shampoo then!), ask him for school and swim help, and when Nitori's hair would get longer, he would go to Mikoshiba to get it cut.

"Come on, Rin." Mikoshiba grabbed Rin's hand and pulled him up.

"Why? We could stay for a little longer." Rin protested.

Mikoshiba shook his head and dragged him away. "We have a match tomorrow."

Rin's mouth was open in shock. "So soon! Why right after the funeral?" He wanted to make sure he heard that right.

"I gave orders that we will not let this phase us." He said, looking ahead. "Did you walk here? I'll give you a ride back."

When they got back to the dorms, Rin opened his door slowly. The captain was already inside of his, ready to close the door until Rin spoke up. "Hey Sei…do you think Ai would be cheering us on?"

The captain scoffed. "That's a stupid question, Rin! Of course he will! If he's not, I'll personally go up to heaven and kick his butt for not coming!" He grinned and shut the door. "Get some sleep Matsuoka!"

Rin sighed, smiling. He pushed the door open, the warmth welcoming him. "I'm home, Ai. It was a long day today." He sat at his desk, looking at a picture of him, Nitori, and the captain.

"You're such a handful." He groaned and took the picture in his hand. "Why'd you have to go home so early? We have a match tomorrow. I expect you to be there." He laughed and walked to the window in their room and looked up at the moon. It was cover by the clouds.

"I see you've made it home safely." Rin turned away and walked back to his bed. He sat on it and said one thing.

"Good night, Ai."

He dreamed about Nitori that night.

'_Rin!' He saw Nitori standing there, eventually turning around to reveal his injury-free face. 'You've been crying.' He put his hands on his hips. 'You know I don't like that!' He pouted. 'Ah…I forgive you. I want to tell you to swim good tomorrow! If you don't…er….I'll haunt you!' He giggled. 'Bye bye for now, senpai! Be good! I love you!'_


End file.
